They launched a new people system. Janet asked, “Who’s it for?” New login. New UI. Mandatory HRIS training. IT said it would “unlock the employee experience.” Janet said she just wants to book leave without a 504 timeout. So she built her own tracker m - in Excel. Formatted. Colour-coded. Already adopted by three other departments. HR called it non-compliant. Everyone else called it usable. #JanetFromAccounts #ColinTheCFO #DigitalTransformation #FinanceTransformation #Leadership #Satire #Corpora

Colin’s year-end review of Janet is finally out - and it reads less like a performance appraisal and more like a public admission that the entire organisation is held together by one competent person. She rebuilt systems vendors couldn’t fix, closed quarters early, corrected strategy with a look, and delivered results no dashboard could predict. HR wanted a list of development areas; Colin couldn’t find any that weren’t fictional. This review isn’t feedback - it’s documentation of why Janet is t